Hurly Burly, the squirrel next door,
Came over to visit one day.
He sat on a pipe, gave his fur a quick swipe,
And invited himself in to play.
I should have said no!
I should have thought to be wary!
But smarts never entered the picture!
I let down my guard,
My door I unbarred,
And Hurly leaped fast off of the fixture!
He ran past my toes,
His tail dusted my nose
As I leaned down to watch him come in.
And since then I've had him,
A visiting add-in,
He thinks he's one of my kin!
But squirrels are not easy,
Their manners un-pleasey,
They certainly raise quite a fuss.
I never expected such chaos, such havoc,
But Hurly has made quite a muss!
My rugs are all shredded,
My mattress debedded,
Old grandfather clock is his nest!
But that's not the worst
With a house that is cursed
With a squirrel that involved in a quest!
He chatters and scratches.
He picks at the latches
Of cupboards that hold all my food!
And if they resist,
His teeth they persist,
And sly is his favorite mood.
So I need a vacation,
Some sleep, a relation
Who doesn't put holes in the wall.
I need someone who's sneaky
Who'll throw out old squeaky.
Is there someone out there I can call?
Someone to beguile him,
To charm him, to file him
With news of eviction today,
Someone who'll relieve me,
Who'll sooth me, who'll free me,
Believe me when I say that I'll pay!
In the meantime it's flea time,
Burly's afternoon tea time,
When I scratch with the rest of the furries,
And wait for that stranger
Who'll play the Lone Ranger
And vanquish my woes and my worries!
"Bye, bye Mr. Squirrel!
Don't come back now!
You rascal you!"